Your Colonoscopy

Sure, he went to the emergency room that time he cut his face open with a chainsaw, and that other time that he tried to fight 4 cops at once, but he never went to the family doctor for a simple check-up or any health test. My ol’ man, God bless him, was a roughneck country boy and he paid the ultimate price for it.

Compare that to the father of one of my high-school friends. Her father had regular colonoscopies, and they caught his colon cancer early. That was in 2005. He’s still alive today.

My father passed away in 2008, just 18 months after his was first detected. In those final 18 months he and I spent a lot of time together, driving up and down the country side roads looking at corn fields, visiting used farm equipment dealerships, and even going to cattle auctions.

But I was robbed of years of ‘chilling on a dirt road’ with him because my father stubbornly avoided going to the doctor for health screening. Of course, I can’t blame him, because he knew the lecture he would have received about his drinking. Still, he shirked his responsibility and we suffered for it.

That brings us back to you. If you skip tests, avoid having a physical, eat junk, skip exercise, and live a stressful life, ultimately you are robbing your children – down the road – of time spent with you. That’s selfish.

So Step-Up. Schedule your tests. Get them done. Think of your family. Think of the little people in your life.

Besides, it’s not that bad. In fact, the entire event was kind of FUN. I even managed to sell a couple of copies of my workout programs to two people in the waiting room while I was lying in my hospital bed.

There was only that one point of discomfort. It happened right after the surgery, when I woke up to a painfully distended belly caused by the air pumped into my digestive tract to help the doctor see around all the nooks and crannies. I felt like the fat villain from Austin Powers. In fact, I was so uncomfortable that it was nauseating.

Fortunately, three nurses crowded around me, encouraging me to “let it rip.”

Ha, when was the last you had three lovely ladies waiting on you, rubbing your belly, and hoping that you’d pass gas?

I felt like Bally the Dog!

And soon the bloating subsided, and I was able to go home.

Thirty minutes later I was walking out of the hospital to get a ride home while eating my first solid food in over 55 hours. A protein bar had never tasted so good. Within ninety minutes post-surgery I was working like it was just another Monday.

Now the countdown is on. Only seven more years till my next package of Jello and another chance to pass gas in public without consequences.

But back to you. Listen, you don’t have to tell anyone that you’re getting a colonoscopy, not that there’s anything wrong with that, as Seinfeld would say. It doesn’t hurt. You won’t even know it happened.

I’m only telling the world because I live my life by Extreme Example. By detailing my surgery, I hope to get you to act.

If I can get just 1% of you to take action, to finally pick up the phone and schedule your appointment, to make a change in your healthy habits, then my work here is done. Of course, I’d like it to be every reader – so do me a favor. Do something!

Please, think of your family. Don’t let your selfishness and stubbornness stand in the way. Take action now. Call the doctor. Schedule the exam. Clean out your colon. Let a stranger look up your bum. Deal with the results. And make the changes you need to make.

Do it for the little people in your life. Whether you’re a new parent or a grandparent, someone in your family that wants you around for a long, long time. And so do I.

Taking care of your health,